POSTED BY on 5:04 pm under
Hi all
Note from Ross & Brian

Cheers
MATT
 These images are from Brian Proudford who showed off his portable hard  drive and his card reader. He has included an image of the Linux  magazine package that he bought.  Also I found out what the trouble was with my Linux displays the other  night. I got them going later at home. One was on a DVD disk and the mullies computer has only cd roms! Also the password for one of the live demo's was on the front of the disk! Regards Ross   Contact Information  This email is brought to you on behalf of the Mulligrubs - Milton Ulladulla Internet & Computers Users Group http://mulligrubs.shoalhaven.info/ The Mulligrubs meet on the last Thursday of each month at the Ulladulla CRC - 78 St Vincent Street, Ulladulla NSW 2539 Send comments, suggestions, or questions about this newsletter to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com You can subscribe or unsubscribe from this discussion group at any time. Simply send a request to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com All names and addresses will be kept confidential and will never be sold or used for any other purpose than forwarding of this newsletter     
POSTED BY on 3:21 pm under
you may have seen this one before

For her wedding Camilla wore a pair of new shoes, which got increasingly tighter as the day went on.
That night, when the festivities were finally over and they retired to their room,
she collapsed on the nuptial bed and said, "Charles darling, please remove my shoes, my feet are killing me!"
Her ever-obedient Prince of Wales attacked her right shoe with vigour, but it would not budge.
"Harder!" yelled Camilla. "Harder!"
Charles yelled back, "I'm trying darling, but it's just so bloody tight!"
"Come on, give it all you've got!" she cried.
Finally, it came off with a pop, Charles let out a big groan and Camilla exclaimed, "There! Oh! God! That feels so good!"
In the bedroom next door, the Queen said to Prince Phillip, "See? I told you, with a face like that, she was still a virgin!"
Meanwhile, Charles was now trying to remove her left shoe.
He cried, "Oh, God! Darling! This one's even tighter!"
At which Prince Phillip retorted to the Queen, "That's my boy. Once a Navy man, always a Navy man!"
POSTED BY on 4:11 pm under
Hello everyone and a big Hi to Enid & Helmut joining the list for the first time
Welcome

We have a note from Avril today who needs some help

----------
Any suggestions, please:

We have "lost" some software that came with the computer.  It is the Apple Works (for Macs) that has the word processing/spreadsheet/database etc in it.  I have tried all the possible methods of searching for it, to no avail.  We still have a file on the desktop which was produced using the spreadsheet option, but of course cannot open it.  We have no idea how it came to be "lost".  I am very wary of reinstalling it as all the bundled software that came with the computer would need to be reinstalled at the same time (as far as I am aware), and it would mean backing up all the existing files (which we have never done).

Can anyone help?
Avril
--------------
I am not familiar with Mac OS but would be pretty sure you probably wouldn't have to reinstall everything from the CD
Usually these "system Restore" type disks have a selective restore/install function where you can pick what parts of the system to install or repair
The Windows disks work this way too

However if you don't need the programs in future but just need the data from this file there is a simpler way
The spreadsheet file you want to open - what kind of file is it?
If you aren't sure just tell us the extension eg. .doc or .txt or whatever
I can probably tell you what program to use to open it or extract the information without having to reinstall the program originally used to create it
Following on from our recent Meeting discussion the Open Office program is pretty good at compatibility and can open lots of file formats - many more than MS Office
And because it is MS Office compatible it can open weird files and convert them to Office docs - very handy
There is a version of Open Office for both Mac OS & OS X as well as Linux, Windows, etc

Most importantly - You should also back-up your files!
Just burn the data files to a CD or DVD
If you have no burner use your network or a portable hard drive (hard disk or a thumb drive) to copy them from that machine to another that does

You may also like to consider imaging your whole hard drive as we have discussed at prior meetings
Let us know how you get on and if you need any more specific help

Cheers
MATT

Contact Information
This email is brought to you on behalf of the Mulligrubs - Milton Ulladulla Internet & Computers Users Group
http://mulligrubs.shoalhaven.info/
The Mulligrubs meet on the last Thursday of each month at the Ulladulla CTC - Top of the Town Complex, Ulladulla NSW 2539
Send comments, suggestions, or questions about this newsletter to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
You can subscribe or unsubscribe from this discussion group at any time.
Simply send a request to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
All names and addresses will be kept confidential and will never be sold or used for any other purpose than forwarding of this newsletter


POSTED BY on 2:52 pm under


*Jamaican Math Test** *

*A Jamaican man wants a job, but the foreman won't hire him until he
passes a little math test.** *

*Here is your first question, the foreman **S**aid. "Without using
numbers, represent the number 9."** *

*"Without numbers?" The Jamaican says, "Dat is easy." And proceeds to
draw three trees.** *

*"What's this?" the boss asks** *

*"Ave you got no brain? Tree and tree and tree make nine," says the
Jamaican.** *

*"Fair enough," says the boss. "Here's your second question. Use the
same rules, but this time the number is 99."** *

*The Jamaican stares into space for a while, then picks up the picture
that he has just drawn and makes a smudge on each tree. "Ere you go."** *

*
*
*The boss scratches his head and says, "How on earth do you get that to
represent 99?"** *

*"Each of da trees is dirty now. So, it's dirty tree, and dirty tree,
and dirty tree. Dat is 99."** *

*The boss is getting worried that he's going to actually have to hire
this Jamaican, so he says, "All right, last question. Same rules again,
but represent the number 100."** *

*The Jamaican stares into space some more, then he picks up the picture
again and makes a little mark at the base of each tree and says, "Ere
you go. One hundred."** *

*
*

*The boss looks at the attempt. "You must be nuts if you think that
represents a hundred!"** *

*The Jamaican leans forward and points to the marks at the base of each
tree and says, "A little dog come along and crap by each tree. So now
you got dirty tree and a turd, dirty tree and a turd, and dirty tree and
a turd, which makes one hundred." *

*"So, when I start?"** *

--
MATT DELL
Matt@NobleJoker.com <mailto:matt@noblejoker.com>

POSTED BY on 2:12 pm under

 New Drink
A woman and her boyfriend are out for New Years
having a few drinks.While they're sitting there having a good time together
she starts talking about this really great new drink.The more she talks
about it the  more excited she gets, and starts trying to talk her boyfriend into having one.
After a while he gives in and lets her order the drink for him.
The bartender brings the drink and puts the following on the bar -- a salt shaker, a shot
of Baileys and a shot of lime juice.
The boyfriend looks at the items quizzically and the woman explains.
"First you put a bit of the salt on your tongue, next you drink the shot of
Baileys and hold it in your mouth, and
 finally you drink the lime  juice."
So, the boyfriend, trying to go along and please her, goes for it. He puts
the salt on his tongue -- salty but OK. He drinks the shot of Baileys -
smooth, rich, cool, very pleasant. He thinks - this is OK. Finally he picks
up the lime juice and drinks it in one second the sharp lime taste hits...
at two seconds the Baileys curdles... at three seconds the salty curdled
bitter taste hits.This triggers his gag  reflex but being manly, and not
wanting to disappoint his girlfriend,he swallows the now nasty drink. When
he finally chokes it down he turns to his girlfriend.
She smiles widely at him and says, "So, how did you like it? 
It's called 'Blow Job's Revenge.''

POSTED BY on 12:44 pm under


It has been scientifically proven that if we drink 1 litre of water each
day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 kilo of
Escherichia coli (E. coli) bacteria found in faeces.

In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of Poo.

However, we do not run that risk when drinking wine (or gin, rum, whisky,
beer) because alcohol has to go through a distillation process of boiling,
filtering and fermenting.

WATER = POO WINE = HEALTH

Free yourself of Poo, drink WINE!!!

It is better to drink wine and talk sh * t than to drink water and be full
of sh * t.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information; I am doing it as
a public service.

Have a nice day...

POSTED BY on 1:08 pm under
You are Windows 98.  You're a bit flaky, but well-liked.  You don't have a great memory, but everyone seems to know you.  A great person to hang out with and play some games.
Which OS are You?


I just did this quiz
These things are usually rubbish but the geek in me liked this one
Plus the result is about right! :)
Try it yourself HERE