POSTED BY on 1:49 pm under
Posted here
http://pogue.blogs.nytimes.com/?p=42

In my never-ending quest to bring you some of the most amusing and amazing tales of tech-support hell, I offer today excerpts from Wilhelm P. Evertz’s letter to the CEO of HP.

“Dear Mr. Hurd:

I do not suppose you have dialed your own technical support number lately. I did yesterday, and I was kept on hold for eight hours, from 6 am to 1:53 pm, without ever being connected to a representative.

“The ordeal would have been slightly more bearable had there not been this voice on the line incessantly telling me: ‘Thank you for your patience,’ and ‘We appreciate your call and thank you for waiting,’ as well as, ‘A representative will be with you as quickly as possible,’ not to mention, ‘We are sorry you are still waiting,’ all underlaid with the most execrable music. Imagine eight hours of listening to this. (In the end I recorded this voice, and the file is available to you, if you so desire.)

“In addition to keeping the line silent, it would also help if HP would announce, as many other companies do, the estimated waiting time. For instance, the message, ‘Your estimated wait is 6 hours and 23 minutes,’ would deter many help seekers.

“While on hold, phone calls are impossible, of course. One also cannot concentrate on work, because one has to keep an ear cocked at the ever-present voice on the phone in the hope that somebody might, after all, come on the line.

“Eventually, even hope dies, and one keeps going, fueled by the perverse desire to find out how long this can go on. Probably it would have gone on all day, but I had to cut it off when my receiver ran low on juice.

It is difficult to discern the mindset of the person who is responsible for creating this eighth circle of hell, in the process alienating thousands of customers. Just normal courtesy would forbid such treatment of fellow human beings.

“It is not only a matter of civility, but also of rights. This service was promised to me in the manual I received when I bought my present printer, and on the HP web site. But HP has apparently no intention to provide it.

“You will understand that I am no longer a Hewlett-Packard fan, and the name is anathema in this house. While waiting and listening to the irresistible voice on the phone, I ordered a Canon replacement printer.

Sincerely,

W. P. Evertz

(Update: Mr. Evertz wrote later to say that his letter evoked a telephone response from HP. “Mainly, she expressed astonishment at the length of the wait,” he writes. “She could not understand how I could stay on the line that long; she would not have done that, she said. She also offered to–and did–send me a pair of cartridges for my printer.”)


--
Matt MCD311 MATT DELL
Matt@MCD311.biz
POSTED BY on 10:31 am under
Well this was going to be brilliant but it wasn't!
Actually I emailed lots of people this humourous spreadsheet which calculates how drunk you would be depending on your weight and how many drinks you had etc
But I can't post spreadsheets here - bummer!
Matt MCD311
POSTED BY on 9:58 am under
1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent. 2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything.” 3. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted. 4. A dyslexic man walks into a bra. 5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: “A beer please, and one for the road.” 6. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: “Does this taste funny to you?” 7. “Doc, I can’t stop singing ‘The Green, Green Grass of Home.’” “That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome.” “Is it common?”“Well, It’s Not Unusual.” 8. Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, “I was artificially inseminated this morning.” “I don’t believe you,” says Dolly. “It’s true, no bull!” exclaims Daisy. 9. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either. 10. Deja Moo: The feeling that you’ve heard this bull before. 11. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn’t find any. 12. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, Doctor, doctor, I can’t feel my legs!” The doctor replied, “I know you can’t I’ve cut off your arms!” 13. I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a mussel. 14. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. 15. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says “Dam!”. 16. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.
--
Matt MCD311 MATT DELL
Matt@MCD311.biz
POSTED BY on 1:41 pm under
Hi all - further to my note to Avril
Ross has supplied the following extra information


---
As to Avril email about accessing the Shoalhaven email. I too have the $2 leftover account. I have my email client download my Shoalhaven and Exemail to my email client with no extra charges from Shoalhaven. Also when away you only need to log onto your Webmail at any computer to read your mail at no extra cost!  When you set up your email at home you set your POP accounts to Shoalhaven  and Powerband but your SMTP is Powerband.
---

So Ross is checking both his inboxes each time and downloading all mail to his one client (Outlook/outlook Express/Thunderbird/Eudora/Incredimail/???).
He is effectively running 2 email addresses with all email received coming into 1 inbox
This is great in the day to day and may allow you to run 2 separate addresses completely
Be aware though that if your client only allows one SMTP server setting that you may not be able to send emails on your old account as the SMTP will not allow forwarding (you can receive them though)
Some clients (I use Thunderbird) allow you to set the SMTP server for each email account and would overcome this problem

Ross's solution won't solve Avril's holiday inbox overcrowding problem
So unless you can check your email (via webmail) while away I still recommend getting the email forwarded to an alternative address
If not your new ISP address then maybe a free one like Gmail which allows over 2.7GB of stored email (33 times the allowance by Shoalhaven!)
You have to be invited to get a free Gmail email address but I have a few invitations available
just let me know if anyone wants won

Cheers
MATT

Contact Information
This email is brought to you on behalf of the Mulligrubs - Milton Ulladulla Internet & Computers Users Group
http://mulligrubs.shoalhaven.info/
The Mulligrubs meet on the last Thursday of each month at the Ulladulla CTC - Top of the Town Complex, Ulladulla NSW 2539
Send comments, suggestions, or questions about this newsletter to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
You can subscribe or unsubscribe from this discussion group at any time.
Simply send a request to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
All names and addresses will be kept confidential and will never be sold or used for any other purpose than forwarding of this newsletter


POSTED BY on 12:42 pm under
Hi all

For those of you who are new to the list - welcome!
If you ever have a question or useful tip or program to share please send me the details and I will forward it on to everyone
I also post all the entries into my blog
You can read the past articles and questions on the web at www.mcd311.biz
Contact details for the group are below

We have a question today from Avril who is lucky enough to be going on holidays

-----
Matt, I wonder if you could explain something to me please:

Our ISP is Powerband (Andrew MacLennan), but my husband has retained our original address with Shoalhaven.net.au at a cost of $2 per month.  Does this mean incoming mail sits with Powerband or with Shoalhaven?  The reason for this query is our upcoming holiday.  I gather we can access the internet, at a great cost, but we really feel we have no need or desire to.  My husband gets a number of newsletters which will certainly mount up, and that he will only need to access when we get back.  I have contacted Andrew who has advised me that there is no limit on the mail held in our post-box, but Shoalhaven say there is a limit of 80MB.  On our invoices from Shoalhaven they record zero downloads and this makes me think that the mail actually comes through Powerband even though the address is Shoalhaven.

Can you clarify this for me, please.

Cheers,       Avril
-----
OK - When you pay for internet access through an Internet Service Provider (ISP) you typically get at least 1 email address with an accompanying inbox
Avril has changed ISP's but obviously was still receiving email at the address provided by her old ISP
Rather than trying to get everyone to email her at her new address she is effectively running 2 addresses
Avril you will be checking (or should be) both your Powerband & Shoalhaven inboxes

Because Shoalhaven limit the size of your inbox (and the limit is small!) it is possible that the inbox would become full when you are away.
One option to solve this is to check your email when on holidays
If you are like me you just can't survive without connecting the net for long! :)
But it might spoil your holiday

My first suggestion would be to contact Shoalhaven and ask if all email can be forwarded to another address and give them your Powerband address
Then all email wont sit at Shoalhaven but will forward straight away to Powerband
As Powerband has no effective size limits on the email inbox all your mail should be waiting for you in the Powerband box when you return
I would leave this in place for good so that in future you need only ever check your Powerband inbox to retrieve the mail from both accounts

With regards to email I highly recommend everyone buy their own domain name
I have actually written about this before
The link below opens my blog with my previous spiel
http://mcd311.blogspot.com/2004/10/more-posts.html

If you own your own domain and therefore control your email addresses it doesnt matter who you use to connect to the net
As an example, this would save Avril the hassle and expense of keeping that old email address alive just in case
And if you are running a business it looks very professional to have your own address with your name in it

If anyone would like more information on buying their own domain then let me know
Maybe I could do a presentation at Mulligrubs one night

Cheers

Contact Information
This email is brought to you on behalf of the Mulligrubs - Milton Ulladulla Internet & Computers Users Group
http://mulligrubs.shoalhaven.info/
The Mulligrubs meet on the last Thursday of each month at the Ulladulla CTC - Top of the Town Complex, Ulladulla NSW 2539
Send comments, suggestions, or questions about this newsletter to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
You can subscribe or unsubscribe from this discussion group at any time.
Simply send a request to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
All names and addresses will be kept confidential and will never be sold or used for any other purpose than forwarding of this newsletter


POSTED BY on 2:07 pm under
Following is a question sent to Fred Langa (Langalist Newsletter at www.Langa.com)
It refers to the fact that Microsoft is about to cease all support for Windows 98 & ME
If you have older equipment that still uses this operating system then this information will be handy for you

Fred's recommendation involves  tidying up your pc and then
taking an 'image' of it
If you don't know what this is or how to do it then make sure to come along to the Mullies meeting tomorrow night and Ian will show you!

See you there :)


Dear Mr. Langa, Great newsletter! I have been a subscriber for some time and have found your advice very valuable.

Like many other subscribers, I have equipment that cannot be upgraded to handle the new OS's (XP or Win2K), but at the same time, the equipment is fully functional. For example, I have a laptop that will run Win95 or Win98 just fine, but because the memory cannot be upgraded, it is unable to run Win XP or Win 2000.

Being environmentally minded, I was hoping to prolong retiring my older equipment to the city dump by extending its useful life as long as I can. With that in mind, I was thinking of getting all necessary software upgraded before July 31st (the date Microsoft is going to discontinue support).

Unfortunately, with all the different kinds of software out there, compiling a list of patches, upgrades, etc. seems daunting. Would you have a recommended list of software patches or upgrades for those of us trying to prolong the useful life of our 95/98 machines?

Obviously, going to a Linux version (like Puppy Linux) sounds interesting, but in the short run, a Windows solution seems easier to implement.  ---Frank Peavy

There's nothing wrong with continuing to use Win98, Frank. It won't stop working when Microsoft withdraws support, of course. It just won't receive further updates. That means that the OS basically becomes frozen in time, and will no longer be modified to handle new technologies or to meet new threats.

I think the analogy we've used before is a good one: It's like an older car. It may still run fine, and is OK to drive. But it won't meet current safety standards, may not handle as well as newer models, and over time will require more and more tinkering to keep running, especially as parts become scarcer and scarcer. Eventually, Win98--- like an antique auto--- will become a curiosity rather than the thing for which it was originally designed and used.

As an amusing aside, take a look at the early Windows shown below: It's from a different discussion, but you'll see Windows 3.0, Win3.1, Win3.11, Win95, Win98, WinME, Win2000 (representing the whole NT family), Win XP, and DOS 6.22 thrown in for good measure, all running simultaneously. When I look at the old Windows--- like 3.0 and 3.11--- I'm amazed that we once thought of them as "advanced" interfaces and state of the art computing. <g>

Std Edition Subscribers: http://www.freetune.com/extras/vpc.htm

Win98 is on a steady march to the same kind of curiosity status as 3.0 and 3.1 have. Win98 was great while it lasted, but its day really is done.

That said, yes, you can keep Win98 running cleanly, almost indefinitely: The very best way I know to try to preserve Win98 is to do one final grand mal cleaning: In shorthand form, you'd reformat, reinstall, and then run Windows Update iteratively until all relevant updates are in place. Run a good Registry cleaner, defrag the system, and then make an image backup of the newly-installed, "perfect" setup. Store that image in a safe place. Then, in the future, if your Win98 setup gets munged when updates and downloads are no longer available, you can always restore the image, and get your Win98 back to that just-installed, perfect setup again.

In more detail:
System Setup Secrets
http://www.informationweek.com/story/showArticle.jhtml?articleID=17500413

System Setup Secrets Updated
http://www.informationweek.com/story/showArticle.jhtml?articleID=12802747

Ten Ways to Make Windows 98 Run Better
http://www.informationweek.com/story/showArticle.jhtml?articleID=12803660

Win98 Cleanup
http://langa.com/cleanup_bat.htm

Win98 Backups/Images
http://langa.com/backups/backups.htm

Curing Win98 Resource Leaks
http://www.informationweek.com/story/showArticle.jhtml?articleID=17200587

Yes, there are less thorough ways of spiffing up Win98, but they produce less optimal results. For example, you can just run the cleanup, above, and a good Registry cleaner, plus a defrag, and probably improve the current operation of a Win98 setup. There's also a "no reformat" reinstall option that cleans up more: http://tinyurl.com/m5kqp

But Win98 is about to become unsupported, so I think it's time to bite the bullet and do one final, fresh, total reinstall. Make that install as perfect as humanly possible. Let Windows update decide what patches and updates to install. Polish, prune, clean, defrag it until it shines. Then preserve that perfect setup as a disk image, and save the image in a protected place. That way, you'll *always* have access to a perfect, like-new install of Win98, no matter what else happens!

Still more info:
http://www.informationweek.com/authors/showAuthor.jhtml?authorID=1111



Contact Information
This email is brought to you on behalf of the Mulligrubs - Milton Ulladulla Internet & Computers Users Group
http://mulligrubs.shoalhaven.info/
The Mulligrubs meet on the last Thursday of each month at the Ulladulla CTC - Top of the Town Complex, Ulladulla NSW 2539
Send comments, suggestions, or questions about this newsletter to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
You can subscribe or unsubscribe from this discussion group at any time.
Simply send a request to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
All names and addresses will be kept confidential and will never be sold or used for any other purpose than forwarding of this newsletter


POSTED BY on 1:34 pm under
Here is some interesting tech information

------------

IMPORTANT NOTE TO ALL MOBILE PHONE USERS

Do you know how to get emergency assistance from your mobile phone?

Call ‘000’ right?

If you don’t already know, here is some interesting information that may be helpful in

the event of an emergency:


For users with CDMA & GSM/digital mobiles – in the event of an emergency you can

call ‘000’ to get through to emergency services


For users with GSM/digital mobiles (not for CDMA users) you can call ‘000’ to get

through to emergency services but you can also dial ‘112’ to reach emergency

services. This ‘112’ number should be operational even when a phone is locked, SIM

card removed or the phone is out of service range of your home network but another

carrier’s service is available. This feature is not available with the ‘000’ number.


So, if you have a GSM/digital phone, you have two options, dial ‘000’ or ‘112’ and if

you have a CDMA phone you must dial ‘000’.


Please share this information with all friends, family, clients, etc., particularly

those with GSM/digital phones that are regularly out of normal range or drive through

‘dead spots' – because in those situations they should still be able to use the ‘112’

number.


If you do have a GSM/digital phone, perhaps you could store the ‘112’ number in your

speed dial so that in a panic you don’t have to remember the number as it is already

in your phone.


Contact Information
This email is brought to you on behalf of the Mulligrubs - Milton Ulladulla Internet & Computers Users Group
http://mulligrubs.shoalhaven.info/
The Mulligrubs meet on the last Thursday of each month at the Ulladulla CTC - Top of the Town Complex, Ulladulla NSW 2539
Send comments, suggestions, or questions about this newsletter to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
You can subscribe or unsubscribe from this discussion group at any time.
Simply send a request to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
All names and addresses will be kept confidential and will never be sold or used for any other purpose than forwarding of this newsletter


POSTED BY on 6:11 pm under


You should all check out this website, it may save your life.
 
http://www.icr.ac.uk/everyman/rachelgetsfruity/flash.html
 


--
Matt MCD311 MATT DELL
Matt@MCD311.biz
POSTED BY on 9:40 am under
A Gym for Your Memory - RealAge Tip of the Day

I found this interesting
To think that exercising might have more than the obvious benefits
It keeps you mentally sharp too!
Now if I could just get out of my cumfy chair
POSTED BY on 5:46 pm under
Some of us have been discussing using bit torrent for p2p networking
But do you know how it works?

Below is a link to an explanation of the Bit Torrent network from one of my fav Aussie forum/sites - Atomic
Check it out

http://www.atomicmpc.com.au/article.asp?CIID=35913&eid=6&edate=20060424

Note Bit Torrent really only works for those on broadband
for dial-up sharing stick with Limewire

For those who have no idea what we are talking about - ask! :)

Contact Information
This email is brought to you on behalf of the Mulligrubs - Milton Ulladulla Internet & Computers Users Group
http://mulligrubs.shoalhaven.info/
The Mulligrubs meet on the last Thursday of each month at the Ulladulla CTC - Top of the Town Complex, Ulladulla NSW 2539
Send comments, suggestions, or questions about this newsletter to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
You can subscribe or unsubscribe from this discussion group at any time.
Simply send a request to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
All names and addresses will be kept confidential and will never be sold or used for any other purpose than forwarding of this newsletter


POSTED BY on 10:09 am under
Hi all
Following is the report on our last meeting compiled by Philip
He has done a great job and even sent it in to the Times Newspaper
Hopefully it will be in next week and will give us a bit more publicity and maybe some new members
Thanks Philip

-------
Mulligrubs

The Mulligrubs held their April meeting on Thursday 27th at 7 pm with an attendance of 29 people

Ross Johnson introduced the guest, Mick Hampson from Telstra, who is the Technical Service Manager, Illawarra Area.

Mick gave a very interesting presentation of Telstra’s work in our area, with their plans for the future.

The emphasis on his talk was on Internet connections, which are mostly carried on telephone ‘twisted pair’ wires owned by Telstra.  The newest technology of 3G (Third Generation) for mobile ‘phones is being rolled out.  Two-Way Satellite Internet connection, that is a computer that operates independently of copper wires, is becoming popular.   Some coffee shops and fast food chains are installing wireless equipment in their buildings for the benefit of patrons with wireless connection laptops.

He told of Telstra’s efforts to make their mobile towers more attractive by disguising them as windmills, palm trees, church spires etc.  It was pleasing to learn that Telstra has resolved to provide mobile coverage for the entire length of Australia’s major highways. Telstra is experimenting in Tasmania with using 240 volt power cables for 'phone and Internet transmissions.

Mick asked for questions from the floor, and the first one was from an Internet user who experienced ‘drop outs’ at times when the school children arrived home.  The answer was to find another ISP (Internet Service Provider), as the ‘pipe’ being used is too narrow.  A ‘pipe’ in this case is a cable.

He also stated that Internet connections would always be bad if a ‘crackle’ can be heard on the telephone. Telstra will test a line at no charge.  The roll out of Broadband is proceeding, but not as quickly as some of us would like.

There is not space here to report everything he said but his presentation was most informative.

There followed a general discussion of people’s problems.  Many questions were asked, and these are three of the most interesting ones.    Roy told of a computer that starts up again after it had been closed down.  John Little told of his ability to print everything except incoming emails.  Enid Hillery wanted to know how to go about changing her Homepage.   Sue Pardon and others provided solutions.

No person should ever feel that his or her question would be ridiculed, because we all started sometime. 

Matt Dell pointed out that when Microsoft released their Windows 98, somebody could buy a legal copy and then lends it to his friends to copy and install.  People could buy a computer from a department store with a copied Windows 98 already installed.  Microsoft are now taking steps to prevent unauthorised use of their Windows XP system, meaning if you want it, you have to buy it.

At the next meeting, which would normally be held on Thursday 25th May, but will now be held on 2nd June when there will be a joint presentation by Ian Connelly and a visitor from Brisbane on the subject of ‘ghosting’.   If you have a gap in your knowledge on the subject of ‘ghosting’ then you should attend.

The Milton-Ulladulla Internet and Computer Users Group, known as Mulligrubs, usually meets on the last Thursday of the month at Shop 3 and 4, Top of the Town, Ulladulla at 7.00pm.  People who attend are asked to bring $4.00 for refreshments.

Philip Smith-Hill

-------

Contact Information
This email is brought to you on behalf of the Mulligrubs - Milton Ulladulla Internet & Computers Users Group
http://mulligrubs.shoalhaven.info/
The Mulligrubs meet on the last Thursday of each month at the Ulladulla CTC - Top of the Town Complex, Ulladulla NSW 2539
Send comments, suggestions, or questions about this newsletter to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
You can subscribe or unsubscribe from this discussion group at any time.
Simply send a request to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
All names and addresses will be kept confidential and will never be sold or used for any other purpose than forwarding of this newsletter


POSTED BY on 9:19 am under

 Hope you haven't seen before

 Dear All - hope you enjoy this!

  

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

(Hardly seems worth it.)

 

 If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.

 (Now that's more like it!)

 

 The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.

 (O.M.G.!)

 

 A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.

(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)

 

  A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death.

(Creepy.)  (I'm still not over the pig.)

 

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories a hour 

(Don't try this at home,maybe at work)

 

 The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.

 ("Honey, I'm home. What the....?!")

 

 The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the  length of a football field.

 (30 minutes..lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

 

 The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.

 (What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

   

 Some lions mate over 50 times a day.

 (I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)

 

 Butterflies taste with their feet.

 (Something I always wanted to know.)

 

 The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.

(Hmmmmmm......)

 

 Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.

(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)

 

 Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.

 (okay, so that would be a good thing)

  

 A cat's urine glows under a black light.

(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)

 

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

 (I know some people like that.)

 

  Starfish have no brains

 (I know some people like that too.)

 

 Polar bears are left-handed.

 (If they switch, they'll live a lot longer)

 

 Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

 (What about that pig??)



--
Matt MCD311 MATT DELL
Matt@MCD311.biz
POSTED BY on 3:42 pm under
FUNNY IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IT BEFORE

50 Things Cool about Being a Man

1. Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.

2. Your orgasms are real. Always.

3. Your last name stays put.

4. The garage is all yours.

5. Wedding plans take care of themselves.

6. You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.

7. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

8. You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut.

9. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.

10. Same work ... more pay.

11. Wrinkles add character.

12. You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch
adjustments.

13. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.

14. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.

15. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.

16. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

17. Porn movies are designed with you in mind.

18. Your pals can be trusted never to ask you, "So, notice anything
different?"

19. One mood, ALL the damn time.

20. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds.

21. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.

22. You can open all your own jars.

23. You can go to a public toilet without a support group.

24. You can leave the motel bed unmade.

25. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

26. If someone forgets to invite you to something, you can still be
friends.

27. Your underwear is $10 for a three pack.

28. If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.

29. Everything on your face stays its original colour

30. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.

31. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

32. You don't have to clean your apartment if the meter reader is
coming.

33. You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without
ever thinking, ''He must be mad at me."

34. No maxi-pads.

35. You don't mooch off other's desserts.

36. You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little
gift.

37. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just
might become lifelong friends.

38. You are not expected to know the names of more than five colours.

39. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a
bolt.

40. You almost never have strap problems in public.

41. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

42. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

43. You don't have to shave below your neck.

44. Your belly usually hides your big hips.

45. One wallet and one pair of shoes, one colour, all seasons.

46. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.

47. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

48. Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives, on
December 24th, in minutes.

49. The world is your urinal.

50. Ten Things Men Know for Sure About Women.
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10. They have tits.


--
MATT DELL
Matt@MCD311.biz

POSTED BY on 2:03 pm under
I thought this was quite amusing for those who know what the Australian Wheat Board Scandal is about RIP Banjo Patterson  I had written him a letter, which I had, for want of better Knowledge, sent to where I met him at the wheat board, years ago. He was chairman when I knew him, so I sent the letter to him Just on spec, to make the point that "Howard doesn't want to know".  And an e-mail came directed, not entirely unexpected (And I think the same was written in some Middle Eastern bar). 'Twas his CEO who wrote it, and verbatim I will quote it: "Trevor Flugge's gone to Baghdad, and we don't know where he are.  "But when he left Australia, he was going to meet with Alia, "A trucking mob in Jordan, who were keen to grease the wheels. "For 10 percent commission, they could swing Saddam's permission "To get our wheat accepted; it's the mother of all deals.  "But I guarantee, Prime Minister, that there's nothing at all sinister. "The chaps at DFAT told us that the sums looked quite okay. "When you're selling wheat in billions, what's a quick 300 million? "If it keeps the Nationals happy, it's a tiny price to pay."  Sitting here at Kirribilli, I've been thinking, willy-nilly, That it's somehow reminiscent of the children overboard: But I can handle Rudd and Beazley, as I always do, quite easily By endlessly protesting that there's nothing untoward.  I'll tell Bush next time I meet him at The White House, when I greet him, That I'm sure he'll understand about the wheat board's quid pro quo. He'll forgive this minor error in the global war on terror When I look him in the eye and tell him Howard didn't know.
POSTED BY on 4:48 pm under
Great meeting on Thursday with the Telstra Rep in attendance
He was quite honest about how Telstra are doing things
It may not have been helpful in some cases but at least you know where you stand

Following is some information from Fred Langa http://www.langa.com
I highly recommend his newsletter for beginners and experts alike

We have spoken of the lifespan of CD's and DVD's at meetings in the past
I thought you might be interested in Fred's opinion

    Good Afternoon Fred--- I know you have written a number of times about the lifespan of CDs. Recently a friend read an article from http://www.pressofac.com/life/story/5972740p-5966674c.html which had the following excerpt:

        Those blank CD-Rs are coated with a layer of dye, which is burned with new information when put in a computer's CD burner. A laser in the computer melts the dye, and that is how information is stored. That dye degrades at different rates depending on the quality of the dye, Dorkin said. For example, blank CDs that are called gold CDs contain a higher quality dye that produces a longer shelf life for photos or music.

    I am interested in two items at present: 1) Are the lifespans of CDs the same as DVDs, or perhaps there is a different manufacturing process?, and 2) Since your last writing, has there been any technological changes to the manufacture of CDs and DVDs that make one or several brands notably superior by their implementation of such a contemplated process? Best Regards, Bruce McCormick


CDs first appeared on the market in 1982, so the oldest CDs in existence are just 24 years old. DVDs arrived in 1996; the oldest DVDs are only 10 years old. And, because both technologies were slow to take off, the vast majority of discs in existence are relative newborns.

Plus, the technologies have changed over time; some newer dyes, for example, have only been around for a relatively few years.

All of which simply means that no one can say, with certainty, how long these discs will usefully hold data over the long haul; it's all guesswork and extrapolation based on accelerated aging tests. There just hasn't been enough time to know--- really know, for certain--- how long they'll last.

Best guess for ordinary office or home storage of CDs and DVDs (e.g not a darkened, climate-controlled, refrigerated vault): If you keep you discs out of direct sun or bright fluorescent light, don't use labels or any kind of adhesives on them; write on them only with water-based or safe-solvent felt-tipped pens; and protect them from abrasion; you probably can count on at least 10 years life. Maybe it's a lot more, but again, know one really knows yet.

Ten years isn't a long time in historical terms, but it's a very long time technologically: 10 years from now, who knows what the current best archival storage medium will be?

So, your best bet is to treat your CDs and DVDs carefully, test them from time to time, and plan on moving their contents to newer, better media when it comes along. (Even if your new DVD lasts 100 years, who's going to have an ancient PC and an ancient operating system to play it then? It'd be like someone handing you an Edison wax recording cylinder today: Even if you knew what it was, all you could do with it is give it to a museum!)

Lots more, including info on the different dyes used in CDRs:
http://www.informationweek.com/showArticle.jhtml?articleID=15800263


Contact Information
This email is brought to you on behalf of the Mulligrubs - Milton Ulladulla Internet & Computers Users Group
http://mulligrubs.shoalhaven.info/
The Mulligrubs meet on the last Thursday of each month at the Ulladulla CTC - Top of the Town Complex, Ulladulla NSW 2539
Send comments, suggestions, or questions about this newsletter to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
You can subscribe or unsubscribe from this discussion group at any time.
Simply send a request to mulligroup@miltonulladulla.com
All names and addresses will be kept confidential and will never be sold or used for any other purpose than forwarding of this newsletter